


What a way to go, though

by what_a_dork_fish



Category: X-Men (Alternate Timeline Movies)
Genre: Ableism, Alternate Universe - College/University, Angst, Canon Disabled Character, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Fake/Pretend Relationship, Hurt/Comfort, I think I'll have more tags later idk, M/M, Transphobia
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-02-29
Updated: 2020-02-28
Packaged: 2021-02-27 20:40:46
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,579
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22941925
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/what_a_dork_fish/pseuds/what_a_dork_fish
Summary: Erik does something inadvisable. Again.Charles is dragged into it. Again.And the entire campus is buzzing with rumors, even the people who've never met either of them. AGAIN.And then Sharon arrives...
Relationships: Erik Lehnsherr/Charles Xavier, Raven | Mystique & Charles Xavier
Comments: 5
Kudos: 16





	What a way to go, though

**Author's Note:**

> eyyy hi I have so many other things to do but I feel like I should share this.

“You can’t even keep a girlfriend! All you have is one friend and he’s just a useless cri–”

“What makes you think he isn’t also my boyfriend?”

A hush falls over the student lounge, as all eyes turn in astonishment to the warring duo in the middle of the room. Emma had confronted Erik in the most public place she could arrange, and now she is gaping at him, utterly poleaxed. In his turn, Erik looks faintly embarrassed, but mostly defiant.

“He’s not useless,” Erik continues, his voice cold, hard, and ringing in the silence. “He’s the smartest person on campus. Just because you’re an ableist asshole doesn’t mean his worth is less than yours. He’s smart and funny and good at chess and admits it when he’s wrong. Unlike _you_. All _you_ do is make fun of people and use your looks to get away with cribbing other people’s work.”

That last one isn’t actually true—Emma is also very smart, and is quickly becoming an expert in her chosen field of psychology with an emphasis on mutant women—but she did it in high school. Who’s to say she doesn’t still do it to get through her least favorite classes?

And every word about Charles is true. Yes, getting him to verbally admit he’s wrong is like pulling teeth, but he always gracefully gives way and says “You have a point” in that tone he has that means he knows the other person is right. And then he pretends to come around slowly, but Erik knows he educates himself thoroughly much more quickly. Erik knows him better than anyone.

That’s why, if he explains this right, he’s sure he can get Charles’ permission for this scam. Just long enough for the rumor to spread and become true. And then they can “break up” and be friends again.

Charles will understand. Of course he will. He’s Charles.

~~~\0/~~~

Charles does his best not to throw his antique glass inkwell at Erik’s head.

“ _Dating_?!” he repeats, aghast. “Erik, you can’t just say that without asking!”

“I know, but it’s just for a little bit,” Erik assures hurriedly, eyeing how Charles’ hand is twitching in the direction of the inkwell. “Just until enough people believe it. Then you can pretend to break up with me, publicly if you want, and we can go back to being friends.”

“How can we go back to being friends if we just act the same way as we always do?! People suck, you know that! They’ll KNOW it was fake!”

Erik starts to say something, then stops, and stares at Charles. “Someone said something,” he deduces flatly. “Someone said something, and you didn’t tell me.”

“It wasn’t important at the time.” No need to tell him it was just last week and it had made Charles cry. “But if you must know, yes, Hank asked me if we were sleeping together and I told him no and it wasn’t any of his business.”

Erik frowns. “But we are sleeping together.”

Charles rubs his forehead, which conveniently drops his head a little. He’s never looked into Erik’s mind before and he doesn’t really feel like doing it now but damn it would be nice to know why Erik thinks like this. “Yes, but that’s seen as a couple thing. We’re not a couple. We’re friends. Telling people we’re dating… Erik, you _know_ how hard it is to make people take our friendship seriously. Multiply that by a hundred. You’ll be accused of having a fetish, I’ll be told I’m just settling because I can’t get better—”

“But that’s bullshit!” Erik interrupts. “You’re hot, that’s not having a fetish! And you can’t get any better than me.”

That would usually make Charles laugh, because Erik being cocky about his sexual prowess when he’s only ever slept with Charles is funny. But he doesn’t feel amused. He feels stressed and angry and sad.

Lying to keep yourself safe is one thing. Charles understands that. But lying for the sake of lying, for the sake of annoying someone or making them shut up, that has never been something he could understand. This isn’t a lie meant to keep them both safe. This is a lie that is going to make both their lives miserable.

“...Charles?”

“What.”

“Do you want me to leave?”

Charles squeezes his eyes shut and rubs them hard to hold tears at bay. It’s just hormones. Just menstrual glooms. It has nothing to do with the fact that he really does want to be Erik’s boyfriend.

“No,” he says finally, lowering his hands and raising his face. “No, we need to talk about this and plan. It happened. You said it. How are we going to deal with the fallout?”

Erik nods, looking relieved, and scoots his chair closer to Charles. “I was thinking we could just keep on like usual, only you’ll be embarrassed and I’ll be angry and we can both say we hadn’t really planned to go public yet. Then—”

“What if I didn’t want to go public at all?”

Erik blinks. “What?”

Charles sighs. “What if I didn’t want to go public with us, ever? You know my mother. You know she’ll have the news soon. She’ll be absolutely insufferable to both of us and she won’t be quiet about it. So we add that to the story. Add that I never wanted to let anyone know for sure, but you wanted to. So you convinced me that it would be okay if we kept it low profile. Except Emma made you angry. Everyone knows you don’t curb yourself when it’s her pestering you.”

Erik flushes.

“I’ll be upset, but I won’t make a big deal. I’ll say it’s fine. You’ll probably get a lot of shit from transphobes, homophobes, etcetera. Please don’t break bones, unless they hit you first.” Charles rubs his temples. “What are you thinking?”

“I’ll pretend it’s… well, I guess I can pretend it’s a relief to say it.” Erik scowls. “I don’t want to kiss in public, though. PDA is off-limits.”

“That’s fine. I’d rather avoid it, too.”

“Good. So I’ll be confirming and I’ll try to keep the other students away from you, since your mother will be after your blood. I’ll tell Mama the truth, though.”

Charles nods. Edith Lehnsherr wouldn’t betray her son for the world. And he’s glad Erik is offering to be a shield. Dealing with Mrs. Xavier-Marko is hard enough without also fending off his fellow students. And Charles can do some subtle things, things Erik won’t catch… things to make Erik’s own fights easier. Protect those you love. Protect them with every tool at your disposal. And Charles has many tools.

~~~\0/~~~

It is, of course, Raven who first confronts Erik.

At least she has the kindness to do it away from the dorms, and drags him into a dark alley so people won’t see them. As usual after she’s been visiting Charles, she can’t seem to choose between forms; her eyes are gold and her hair is red, but her skin is still pale blue and the hair is still long with blond tips. Charles says she does it because she’s proud and wants to show off; Raven says she does it because she doesn’t know what she wants from her brother. A reaction. Something.

But right now, that’s not what she’s thinking about. Right now, Erik is a little wary of her, and is slowly making sure of the fence a feet yards away, so he can unravel it with a flick of thought and trap her until he can get away.

“You are not dating him,” she hisses, and her rage makes her skin ripple faintly. “You are _not_ dating my brother, so why the hell did you say that?!”

Erik tries to think fast, but he’s torn. Raven is a good ally. She was the one who introduced him to Charles. But at the same time, she will do and say anything to protect her foster-brother. If that means putting Erik in a coma, she’ll do it.

“What do you think Emma will want most?” Erik throws at her, trying to buy himself time. “What do you think will satisfy her enough that she’ll keep his name out of her mouth?”

“She wants him out! That’s what she’s wanted since they met! This will be one too many, he’s already on trial for being a mutant, if the dean finds out he’s bi, too—!” Raven cuts herself off to take several deep breaths, which Erik has never witnessed before. She’s scared. She’s furious, but she’s scared, too. “Everything will come out,” she says finally, glaring at him. “ _Everything_. And it will be because you can’t keep your fucking mouth shut.”

Erik wants to ask what ‘everything’ means, but he thinks he can guess. Charles hasn’t gotten this far without extracting wordless pacts from everyone who’s ever found out the truth. The teachers and other students might accept him as trans, might accept him as bi, and a substantial amount think it’s really cool that he’s a mutant—but no one knows he’s a telepath, and if the dean hears all the whispers about Charles, he’s out on his ear. There’s too many factors against him. His mother cut him off when he was 18, so he’s been surviving on Disability benefits and part-time tutoring, and he has no money to back him. And the dean, and most of the mummies who make up the school board, don’t like him already. Sharon made sure of that.

Why didn’t Charles tell Erik? He knows better than anyone. Maybe he’s hoping they can calm the waters before it gets that far…

But Erik sees it now. Why Raven is so upset. Because the waters aren’t going to calm. Not when Erik is part of the equation too.

Erik’s shoulders slump, and he loses his touch on the fence, as he stares at Raven. “Oh,” he says softly.

“Exactly,” she replies, also soft, and there’s actually tears in her gold-green-blue-brown-gold eyes. “You fucked it all up, Erik. All of it. Just because you don’t like Emma.”

There’s more to it than that. But Raven doesn’t know. And Erik isn’t going to tell her. She’s already worried enough.

“I… I’ll fix it,” Erik says firmly, but inside he’s daunted. “I’ll find a way to fix it and everything will be fine.”

Raven stares at him incredulously, and he realizes that she knows he’s lying. But instead of saying anything, she shakes her head and walks away. Her hair is limp and blond and her body is smaller than usual.

~

Erik’s roommate, Alex, is the next to say something.

Alex is one of those rare people that Erik gets along with _because_ their backgrounds are similar. They were both accused of murder, and they were both proven innocent, though it was a very close shave in Erik’s case. They both attended minor colleges only just long enough to secure scholarships to Columbia, and they both frighten people. They look different, though; Alex is the typical “handsome American”, with sandy brown hair that’s almost blond and moody blue eyes, as well as perfect white skin. Erik has hair so dark it looks black, except for the thick streaks of white, and his eyes are green-grey, pale where his skin is dark and has almost a copper tone.

There’s one more difference: while Erik considers Charles his best friend, Alex considers Charles too far above himself to be a friend. It’s weird, except Charles is getting his doctorate and Alex is barely 20, so of course there’d be a bit of hero-worship for the guy who tutored him so excellently and also introduced him to the loves of his life. But still. The unwavering loyalty Alex has granted Charles is really weird to Erik, whose own unwavering loyalty is just a matter of course.

“So I heard you’re dating Charles,” Alex drawls, sitting upside down in his desk chair and throwing balls of paper in the air, incinerating them with a bolt of energy before they start to fall.

Erik rolls his eyes and plops down at his own desk. “Yeah, so?”

“Just wanted you to know that if you hurt him, I’ll kill you.”

“You’ll have to fight Raven for the chance,” Erik replies flippantly, but a chill creeps up his spine at Alex’s tone. He heard it once before, when some guy had been threatening Angel. That guy had disappeared that night and a strange pile of ashes was found behind the bar… but no one had connected it to Alex except Erik, Angel, and Charles.

Erik isn’t sure Alex is actually innocent of that murder charge.

“Raven will let me kill you a little bit, don’t you worry,” Alex assures, and continues incinerating paper. Erik keeps his shiver to himself and gets to work on what little studying he still has to do.

At 1AM, Alex goes to bed, and Erik waits until he’s sure Alex is asleep before going to bed himself. He’s on high alert after Alex’s statements, and he’s not sure Alex won’t kill him as a preemptive measure.

But he wakes up in the morning with his body intact and his soul still in the material plane, so he considers that a win.

~~~\0/~~~

Charles does his best to ignore the looks and the whispering thoughts, but when he feels Emma’s cold, sharp mind approaching, he braces himself and eases into a place along the wall where they won’t get in anyone’s way.

“Hello, Miss Frost,” he says politely when she appears from the crowd, her face already suspicious and angry. Her hands are tightened into fists, but that is the only other physical sign of her distress.

“Hi,” she says shortly, then immediately jumps to the point of her approach. “Why are you dating Erik?”

“Because I want to,” Charles replies simply.

“Yes but _why_?”

“I don’t see that it should matter to you.”

“Of course it matters to me! I grew up with him, he doesn’t just _date_ people!”

Now _that_ is interesting information that Erik has never shared. Charles decides on a noncommittal “People change, Miss Frost.”

“Not him. He never changes. You _did_ something to him,” Emma hisses, taking another step forward to loom over Charles. He straightens in his chair and meets her eyes without fear. “You did something, _made_ him like you. Why?”

“Why would I make someone like me, especially if we have a good friendship?” Charles retorts, irritated now. “He’s intelligent and talented and stubborn as a pig and I lo—like him.”

He thought the fumble had been too fast for her to catch, but no, Emma’s eyes narrow, and now she’s confused as well as furious. Inside, Charles cringes and wants to leave, but outside he says calmly, “Are you done now, Miss Frost?”

She does not reply. She simply turns and walks away. Charles sighs quietly and moves back into the main flow of the hall, which has cleared by then. His class doesn’t start for another twenty minutes, but he’s tired and there are obstacles in the way, so it is inevitable that he will be late. Damn Emma. But it’s thought with tiredness, not anger.

Still. He will have to ask Erik about growing up with Emma. That adds yet another layer to this mess they’re trying to mitigate. For now, though… classes.

**Author's Note:**

> Comments please, as always.


End file.
